A disclaimer before we get started: this news post isn't the result of any sort of drama, or an attempt to cancel me. I am writing this purely out of my own free will, because I feel as if it is the right thing to do.
Recently, as a select few people may or may not know, I had gotten into the habit of DMing some Newgrounds creators whose work I enjoy, and asking if they would like to talk with me on Discord. While this may come across as weird to some, it gave me a surprising amount of success, and I was able to talk with a handful of new people this way.
However, I then started to feel as if I had made a mistake. When it comes to online friends especially, I've noticed I tend to have a bit of an attachment issue. Whenever I started talking to a person that I ended up thinking is really cool, I started trying to talk to them more and more past that initial conversation, up to once daily in some cases. It's obviously up to the reader to determine their own feelings about this, but I tried my best to not go overboard - I limited myself to at most two attempts at conversation per day, and when that didn't work, I'd give at least a day's break before trying again. Additionally, I would often ask them what way they felt most comfortable talking, and at what times would be best for them.
However, as this continued, it started to consume more and more of my life. This is not a problem that is new, or unique to this recent handful of creators I've been talking to; however, I feel as if it has been amplified by it. The problem I have is that I can start to feel lonely and unwanted when the people I like the most aren't around for me to talk to. Oftentimes these people would be busy doing other things, and when they didn't respond to my messages then I'd start to feel both lonely and guilty, as I felt like I was disturbing them unnecessarily.
But the straw that broke the camel's back, and the reason I'm writing this post right now, is that eventually one of these people sent me a message, saying that I was making them feel uncomfortable and asking me to stop sending them DMs. I can't lie, this message really hurt to read, not just because it came from somebody who I especially enjoyed talking to, but because it made me realise how much of a problem my attachment issue has become, and the effects it could have on the people I talk to.
Not long after receiving that message, I made the decision to delete my Discord account entirely. This may seem like an extreme step, but it's one that I feel is necessary, as I don't think I would otherwise be able to stop myself from continuing to send so many DMs. Hopefully, by getting rid of the platform that was causing such an issue for me (and potentially others), I will be able to take a step back and re-evaluate my approach to friendships and their boundaries.
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I would like to apologise to anyone I have made uncomfortable through these DMs. I can assure you that was never my intention, but I now realise how it can make certain people feel, and I believe the best solution for me is to cut off the source of the problem entirely.
I want to make it clear that I do not blame anybody else for my actions; only myself. As I said, this is a problem I have struggled with for a long time, and it's something that I need to take action on.
I have also made the decision to delete both of my Bluesky accounts. While not directly related to my behaviour on Discord, the whole situation has made me want to additionally start cutting down on my social media usage. Newgrounds and YouTube will be my only two platforms, and I feel like that is something I can manage. My Newgrounds DMs will still be available for anyone wishing to contact me.
Once again, I am incredibly sorry for the way I have acted. I will be taking this time to re-evaluate my approach towards communication, and figure out a way for improving myself going forward.
Regards,
Glitch